Hey everybody! So, here we are, December 31st and very soon we'll be closing out 2020.
It's raining here and as I sit here listening to the thunder it seems only befitting that we close out this year with a rumble doesn't it?
I mean, there are a lot of things about 2020 that simply SUCKED but, as I sit here ready to tick off all of the people that I missed, things that I didn't get to do, or wished had been different, I was struck by a few things that actually are pretty great that happened this year that I'm pretty sure, had it not been for the pandemic conditions and restrictions placed on our lives, for me, would never have happened. So, this blog will be all about those things.
It kinda feels like there has been a theme this year, at least for me, and it is that 2020 has been a year about relationships. How we transverse them, how we nurture them, and how we react when we realize that ultimately, sometimes, it's time to end some.
One of the hardest things this year for me has been the tremendous change in my daily life when it comes to my home. If I've not mentioned it before, my husband of 3 years retired last September and our plan was to travel abroad, do jaunts around the USA in or RV Trailer, and spend more time making memories with friends and family. Obviously THAT didn't happen. What did happen is that my husband spent a lot more time at home, especially during the first few months of quarantine. He had his own plan for retirement, things that didn't include me, like perfecting his golf game, volunteering as a youth advocate for at risk teens, and working with a retirement specialist on our investments, but of course none of that happened either.
What did happen is that we ate....a lot, and we spent a lot of time indoors trying to keep ourselves occupied while harboring some resentment that we found ourselves in this predicament. With every trip that I had to cancel the sadness just heaped on. If I'm being honest, it was a bit heartbreaking and as I watched my newly retired husband, whom only a few short months ago was filled with so much hope and promise of "what was to come" withdrawal into his small world, at the top of the stairs, closed in his one space in this new home where he can find solace and privacy, it filled me with sadness and a sense of loneliness that I'd thought after marrying him, I'd never experience again. But, I suppose that part of marriage isn't it. Learning how to live with each other, and alongside each other, and still maintain your own sense of self.
So needless to say, we struggled, but because we love fiercely, we were able to find our way to the other side, holding onto the hope for a better tomorrow and a 2021 that will bring the much needed changes that we feel so strongly about. Cheers to that...and to love.
This year has also brought some amazing women friends into my life. As a long time single woman I can seriously appreciate my girl squad and obviously, I have had my fair share of them over the years but not until this most recent political administration laid several of my friendships to waste, did I truly appreciate how significant your chosen gal pals can be in your life.
When things are at their worst is when you know who your true friends are, and as a gal that really puts a lot of time and effort into my friendships I sincerely value the things that they add to my life to enrich it and make me feel loved and this year my gifts have been plentiful. I rediscovered a friendship that had always been there, on the fringes, because of so many things happening in life. Children, relationships, and careers have a way of getting in the way when it comes to relationships and this was one of those times. But truth be told, a desire to nurture it probably played a role as well.
Regardless of the reasons, this pandemic brought us closer because of mutual friends in our circle and one day I was sitting there after having spent a lovely, much needed afternoon with this woman, and I realized that I really DID want to be friends with her. I mean, REAL friends. The kind that work at it, that lift each other up, that support you in your choices, and that enrich your life in a way that only a woman can and so, I told her, and now, we have begun a new friendship path. One that I hope will continue well into the twilight of my life. Kisses lady. You know who you are.
A few new friends made their way into my life this year as well. We would sit outside in the backyard, properly socially distanced, drinking wine and keeping our chins up, talking about all the things that we will do when this is over and sharing secrets the likes that only women friends can share. And my far away friend and I were able to stay in touch and share our quarantine experiences via text and email. She is a big supporter of my new role as an influencer and it helps to remind me that even at 57 years old, we CAN learn new things and reimagine our lives in a different way. Sending kisses to the west coast.
They have been my saving grace, my salvation when my home started to close in on me, and my sounding board when I felt I was failing as a wife, all the while reminding me how amazing I am. EXACTLY what you need to hear from your friends. Cheers to you ladies! You're simply the best that a girl could ask for!
Another friendship that has been permanently cemented this year is the one with my husbands best friends wife. She and I were initially thrown together because of our husbands mutual affection but very quickly I realized that she was a kindred spirit to me. We discovered that we have many things in common from childhood trauma to us both collecting Christmas Nut Crackers. She is quietly funny, undeniably loyal, and a steadfast voice of experience when it comes to walking me through my marriage as she has managed her own for over 25 years. She is a dear, dear friend and I couldn't be more grateful to have her in my life.
Last but not least, my relationship with my sister has grown stronger and closer due to the amount of time we have been able to spend with each other this year. With exception of my husband, it is THE most important relationship in my life and I treasure every moment I get to spend with her and her ever growing family. They are just the right amount of loud, crazy, drama that I need in my life and I am awed by her ability to love all of them so completely. She is the glue. She is the lioness, fiercely protecting them. She is the owl, dispensing wisdom and sage advice. She is their rock, even as she shows her own vulnerabilities. She is simply amazing. I love you sissy.
So, it's time to give a big heave-ho to 2020. I'm happy that you happened, and 'm just as happy that now your time has run out. Take with you all the gloom and doom and let us usher in a renewed sense of hope and with it, love. I don't typically do resolutions however, my overall health will be more the focus this year and that includes my mental health. I'm sure that many folks struggled with depression this year and I am no exception so staying physically active is great way to help combat that.
Also, taking care of my emotional needs is right up there as well so I'm choosing to spend more time doing things that challenge my mind, enrich my life experiences, and help me enhance my relationships with my fabulous friends, family, and my husband. Basically, I pledge to be a better me.
Regarding this AH-mazing Houndstooth Dress in all my photos, it's 40% Off at Ann Taylor and I LOVE it...can you tell?
Side Note: See, I'm the girl that can't wear red lipstick without getting it all over my teeth. What a dork!
Cheers friends! Happy New Year to you all and thank you for hanging in there with me, being supportive and encouraging this year. You all rock! Here's to a better 2021!!
XOXO